Dumb iPad

Image: Adobe Firefly

This time from the three-letter security alphabet, I’m picking the A — for availability — because the colleagues I complained to in a meeting about my iPad thought I really ought to write something about it. So here goes.

What happened? Well, my iPad had decided to cut off all contact with the outside world. Neither via Wi-Fi, nor via the SIM card. Apps that needed internet access grumbled that they couldn’t connect, or simply did nothing, without so much as a word of explanation. Not a single app gave even the faintest hint about what was holding it back. The obvious fix — turning it off and on again — didn’t help either, and the battery was nicely charged.

Time to call in reinforcements. The helpdesk had a magic button combination up its sleeve: “Press the volume-up button, then the volume-down button in quick succession. Now hold the power button until the Apple logo appears.” Now, on this iPad (10th generation), the top button is not a power-off button, which immediately had me sceptical. But fair enough, worth a try. Which one is volume-up again? Ah yes, this one. Press, press, press, wait… No Apple logo.

After that, the helpdesk fired a whole series of questions at me. For instance, whether other devices were connecting just fine — a logical question, which I could confirm. So it had to be the device itself. Buried near the bottom was a question that made me go red in the face pre-emptively: whether flight mode might accidentally be switched on. It’d be just your luck, wouldn’t it — a stray finger tap silences your device and then you go complaining it won’t talk to anyone. Fortunately, I could quickly stand down: flight mode was off.

Patiently, my friendly colleague suggested the next option: resetting the network settings. That puts just that specific part back to factory defaults. No joy there either. So the helpdesk pulled out the nuclear option: a full factory reset. Well, it had been coming, but as a user that’s obviously the last thing you want. It means setting up your device from scratch, and that takes time.

I left it alone for the rest of the day, but in the evening I tried my luck with AI. The clever chatbot came up with suggestions similar to those from the helpdesk. Notably, the very first option — the button sequence — revealed that I shouldn’t be pressing volume-up then volume-down, but the other way around: first “the volume button closest to the top button”. Which is, in fact, volume-down. After going through the full ceremony, the Apple logo did appear this time, but the problem wasn’t solved.

A few suggestions later, my AI companion asked whether I might be using a VPN. As it happens, last year, when I attended a conference in the US, I had indeed activated my personal VPN on the iPad to use the hotel and conference Wi-Fi without a care in the world. I’d completely forgotten, but I checked anyway (wise lesson: never assume you know the answer — just follow the instructions of whoever’s trying to help you).

After turning off the VPN app, a miracle occurred: the iPad sprang back to life. That thing had simply gagged my iPad. AI’s response: “It happens more often than you’d think: an update to the VPN app or an expired certificate causes the app to block all traffic (the so-called Kill Switch), even if you haven’t consciously activated the VPN.” What I find most troubling about the whole affair is that the VPN didn’t bother to mention that it had shut everything down. Same as that time they’d kicked me out for an alleged violation of the terms of service. I only discovered weeks later, by accident, that I had no VPN. Anyway, my subscription is up for renewal soon, and it’s too expensive and too American anyway. I’m switching to something friendlier.

An app that was supposed to protect my device had compromised its availability. Not great. And oh yes, the other two letters? Those are, of course, the I for integrity and the C for confidentiality. There — we’ve run through the entire security alphabet again.

Next week, due to the shortened working week, there will be no Security (b)log.

 

And in the big bad world…

• security companies are hackable too.
• hackers sometimes hack other hackers.
• ShinyHunters hacked the company behind an American learning management system…
• and escalated when the company didn’t respond to the extortion.
• Dutch universities are also affected by that hack. [DUTCH]
• most passwords can be cracked in the blink of an eye. (Article contains product placement, but remains substantively interesting.)
• the Edge browser makes retrieving passwords awfully easy. [DUTCH]
• the popularity of AI is being exploited to spread malware.
• a fake moustache helps children bypass age verification.